My aunt Sandi suddenly died last week. I've been driving back and forth from Dallas to Houston to Austin for the last few days and its been exhausting.

The memorial service was today. I spoke a bit about her. I told the crowd how I took my pants off the night she first met me. I was 5. Shes been a big part of my family life since I can remember.

Her husband (my uncle) and his kids (my cousins) are handling as best they could. I feel for them. I worry about them. But its so tragic my brain wont let me cross into the super sad state of mind for some reason. I am sad but its not the level of sad I would expect. Or is it? Does that come later?

Its very weird to have someone who was fine one day suddenly leave this world and your life. I see a picture of her and I feel like she's still around. I literally cannot imagine the pain my cousins and uncle are feeling right now.