New Zealand

Had a friend call me for the first time in 7 months.

He hated his job here, saved up and moved to New Zealand. I remember the night he sat on my couch, wearing his work clothes. He said "Man I just want to save up some money and get the fuck out of here." (Something along those lines)

Well he did it. He slaved at the job, rose to middle management and all the while saved every penny. He amassed a small chunk of money and just dropped everything and moved to New Zealand. I'm sure he misses Circuit City.

This was months ago. Well hes back in Austin and called me. His voice was calm. He didn't really know where to start. Funny how it feels like yesterday I talked to him.

The trip cleared his head. He is thinking about going back to school to study a whole new field. He is debating on leaving for Colorado or California. He doesn't know what he wants to do but it feels like a wide open highway for him.

Sometimes I am reminded how limited I see things. For all the ego I have about my own enlightenment, it frequently dawns on me that I really don't feel enough, take chances enough or follow adventure the way I should.

I'm not necessarily talking about running off to another country. Although that really seems pretty sweet at this moment in the night. But my friends finding their purpose lead me to think I am stagnant in that regard.

All my cracks are starting to show the older I get. I really don't know what I want. In any aspect of my life. How scary is that?